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Ziggy Stardust
03-11-2008, 12:44 PM
Bars Find Unique Way To Beat New Smoking Ban (http://www.citynews.ca/news/news_20366.aspx)
Friday March 7, 2008
CityNews.ca Staff

Whatever your feeling on smoking bans, you kind of have to admire the way some bars in Minnesota are getting around their state's tough new restrictions on the practice. Like Toronto, Minnesota has banned smoking in its pubs and nightclubs, but the legislators did leave one loophole - actors on stage are allowed to light up a cigarette if it's something their characters would do in the context of a play.

And therein lies the nefarious plot of this multi-act drama.

Some bars, faced with the dilemma of having to tell their patrons to butt out or leave, have decided on an alternate plan that's as devious as it is bizarre. They've officially proclaimed their evenings 'theatre nights' and designated all their customers as 'actors', insisting they're part of a 'play' being performed at the establishments. And as members of the 'cast', they're legitimately allowed to light up.

The obvious ploy hasn't fooled anyone, of course, but it seems to have taken on a life of its own. Some pubs have begun printing up playbills and encouraging their customers to come in costume, getting into a spirit of the protest while using real spirits. Many have embraced the ridiculous idea, speaking in accents and improvising, all with plumes of smoke emanating from between their fingers.

One spot even put up a sign reading "Props Department". What was located there? Ashtrays for those whose characters feel the need to smoke.

But even those whose "extras" sit around smoking and drinking like before are claiming - in their best Jon Lovitz-impression - "I was acting!"

"They're playing themselves before Oct. 1," explains Brian Bauman, who owns a bar called The Rock. "You know, before there was a smoking ban. We call the production, 'Before the Ban!'"

At another night spot, owner Lisa Anderson has gone all out to attract her own group of local 'thespians.' "I was dressed in a Victorian dress with the old fluffy thing that weighs 500 pounds," she recalls. "We had some fairies and some pirates and a group of girls - I'm not sure what they were, but they had big boas and flashy makeup ... It's turned into the funnest thing I can imagine."

Another watering hole has dubbed its 'performances' "The Tobacco Monologues."

So far, about 30 establishments have adopted the idea and it's not something authorities are toasting. They intend to stop the practice, warning fines as high as $10,000 will be levied for those caught breaking the rules. "The law was enacted to protect Minnesotans from the serious health effects of secondhand smoke," state Health Commissioner Sanne Magnan relates. "It is time for the curtain to fall on these theatrics."

But it's obvious the idea is getting rave reviews from some. Many of the bars that have opted to take advantage of the situation say their business has increased, with Anderson noting her profits went from $500 when the ban took effect to $2,000 once the theatre nights began.

Despite the bad reviews from critics, there's no sign these 'plays' will be closing anytime soon.

:D:up:

DBZ-metalhead
03-11-2008, 12:50 PM
Bars where dressing up in a costume is encouraged 365 days a year? I don't care about the smoking, the idea is just too funny:D

Miang
03-11-2008, 01:03 PM
Well, it's a filthy habit...

- but it sounds like a good riot. Good luck to them.

Illusions
03-11-2008, 01:03 PM
:D:up:

I also heard norelco is coming out with a razor coated in heparin for those people wanting to commit suicide and avoid the mess of waking up and finding out the police/emt got to you before you managed to bleed out... :o

Ziggy Stardust
03-11-2008, 01:07 PM
You really need to get that sand out of your vagina illusions. It might cause permanent damage if you leave it there too long. :)

Illusions
03-11-2008, 01:16 PM
You really need to get that sand out of your vagina illusions. It might cause permanent damage if you leave it there too long. :)

I'm sorry for not applauding people figuring out a way around something that was condoning a habit that is slowly killing them, and profiting from it... :o

Nessus
03-11-2008, 01:18 PM
I'm sorry for not applauding people figuring out a way around something that was condoning a habit that is slowly killing them, and profiting from it... :o
Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% mortality rate :noob:

Ziggy Stardust
03-11-2008, 01:19 PM
I'm sorry for not applauding people figuring out a way around something that was condoning a habit that is slowly killing them, and profiting from it... :oFine Mr. Poopypants, your sour objection is noted, now please try to find the kindness in your heart to remove your sorry ass out of my happy thread :)

Illusions
03-11-2008, 01:27 PM
Alright, I'll leave any death cultist who wishes to participate in the ritual worshipping of their tobacco god alone...in this thread at least... :bored:

Ziggy Stardust
03-11-2008, 01:35 PM
Ooh death cultist. Thanks Sandy.

EmperorNorton
03-11-2008, 01:47 PM
Alright, I'll leave any death cultist who wishes to participate in the ritual worshipping of their tobacco god alone...in this thread at least... :bored:

So...does this 'death cult' include sunbathers. Hmm?

http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y22/lburbo/s_aed4f418ef59e23efbdb59fae85d3239.gif

Illusions
03-11-2008, 01:54 PM
So...does this 'death cult' include sunbathers. Hmm?



Well that depends. Are they immune to cancer, or are they plants? Or do they plan on dying of natural causes before the cancer sets in? That and you probably have to be religious about it. None of that only showing up on holidays like Spring Break, or that one time you happened to be in Cancun... :o

DBZ-metalhead
03-11-2008, 02:00 PM
Fined for the overuse of :o

']['ear
03-11-2008, 05:26 PM
+1 for creativity

DecoyMilk
03-11-2008, 08:58 PM
Man, I wish the politicians here were dumb enough to leave loopholes in the smoking ban :sour:

Widows Peak Oz
03-11-2008, 09:05 PM
Ziggy is either looking for lulz, or disgust, in which case HE gets teh lulz.

Dreadnaught
03-11-2008, 10:03 PM
:haha: This is funny. Though technically, don't they have to pay the patrons?

Wait until some damn union comes in and shuts the whole thing down. :o

teclis
03-11-2008, 10:51 PM
props to them!

catgrrl
03-11-2008, 11:20 PM
Very creative idea. :haha:

Got to love loopholes! :noob: